AADD-UK
The site for and by adults with ADHD
Review date: Next review due:
Home Living with ADHD Organisation Relationships Money Management University & College Workplace Crisis Helplines
Discussion
16 Responses to “Women & ADHD”
Leave a Reply
Authors
-
AADD-UK
-
veillantif
- Update:Cambridgeshire’s denial of NHS treatment for adults newly diagnosed with ADHD
- AADD-UK’s response to Cambridgeshire’s denial of NHS treatment for adults newly diagnosed with ADHD
- Parent of a child with ADHD? Have a free car under £1.5bn taxpayer-funded scheme
- Bristol Adult ADHD Support Group Meeting (and Bedford)
- 1st International Congress for the European Network Adult ADHD
-
aethelreadtheunready
Hello, I have just started to suspect that I may have ADHD, not sure if that is what it is though. Went online and found this site, I’m not really sure I will take it further, let’s face it I’m not great at following things up. The comments above got me a bit down though, I’ve lived in the UK for about a year, haven’t gotten a GP yet, even though I need one since I have asthma, but I don’t remember to take my medication anyway so I’m not sure it matters LOL: I think it gets me nervous because it’s more than a one step procedure, I can barely make it through that much on a good day, I have the attention span of a five year old. I read a booklet about ADHD an the pieces fit together too well to be a coincidence. I suspected for a while that I was dyslexic, but I don’t have problems with reading and writing. I’m quite sufficient in that area( in Swedish anyway), so much in fact that I’ve made it through school and college by writing essays two hours before they were due and getting away with it, with fairly good grades too. I’m unable to keep routines, I forget to pay bills (thank god for direct debit), I forget important appointments even if I’ve written them down and I am unable to wind down, movies are too long so I watch tv series instead, I can do that for hours though. in fact I like it when there is some stress involved, that makes things faster. If I get caught behind someone who takes too long to get their money out at the store literally makes my skin crawl. The point is that I have no idea where to begin looking, I don’t even know where to look for a GP, please help
Posted by Bella | January 31, 2012, 12:16 pmHi,
Fro a detailed respose please post on our forum, but if you want to start by looking for a GP try here:
http://www.nhs.uk/servicedirectories/Pages/ServiceSearch.aspx?ServiceType=GP
Posted by AADD-UK | January 31, 2012, 12:21 pmlol what a wally I am, I didnt think the first post had posted, thats adhd for you lol
Posted by Emma x | January 4, 2012, 12:52 amhttp://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/attention-please/201006/the-adhd-brain-quintessential-supercomputer
I like to think were unique and special, Im crazy somedays, and sad others, mostly manic, I used to cry alot and think I was weird….but were not..were great, so give yourself a great big hug and wipe the tears from your eyes because Im pretty sure you are all lovely people, oh and copy the link above it’s really interesting!
Posted by Emma x | January 4, 2012, 12:51 amhttp://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/attention-please/201006/the-adhd-brain-quintessential-supercomputer
Copy and paste this link, it’s really interesting, Im 40 and the mad things ive done and odd behaviour, and all the things you have said above, is so true with me too, we just need to learn to cope with ourselves, we should have been taught as children but were misunderstood, so give yourselves a great big hug and wipe the tears from your eyes and embrace your differences xx
Posted by Emma x | January 4, 2012, 12:46 amLadies, my daughter was diagnosed with ADHD at the age of 7 after many years of trying to get medical services to take me seriously. I heard she was too young, and then Girls dont get it. etc etc. Her first consultant (and she has had many mainly locums, different ones every time) told me the best advise he could give me was that my daughter was a disabled child and that as normal as she might look to the rest of the world I was never to forget this. I wont lie its been a tough road and we have had our ups and downs, She is now 23 with two small children and another on the way and is really struggling to cope with the day to day challenges of looking afterthem and a home and her finances. I count us as lucky as we were lucky enought to find a consultant who would continue her treatment after the age of 18 when childrens services just washed their hands of her. She needs lots of support, coping mechanisms etc etc but the one thing I want to share is that she is and always has been highly intelligent but is perceived as Lazy by outsiders looking in. ADHD is a hidden disabiity and deserves the same support and respect as Autism. You are all not alone, its just that there are fewer females diagnosed than males and you are not understood by the general population. I understand and I will continue to fight for my child and now my grandchidren and I promise If any of you want to contact me because you feel like a freek your not by the way or feel isolated I am a good listener xx
Posted by Sue Smith | November 15, 2011, 8:07 pmhi this is my second comment,
and all i can say to you girls is keep trying dont think of it as 1 appointment think of it as kind of a journey that will take some time so that you dont give up or keep getting your hopes dashed. it took me 14 years of being wrongly diagnosed as having depression before i got a correct diagnosis and i had to figure out i had it myself and go to the doctors with the information myself and the mad thing is iv now been told iv never had depression !! keep trying different doctors read as much as you can on adhd and dont give up and good luck every1 with your diagnosis and getting the right treatment hope yas all get there xx
Posted by marie dawson | November 4, 2011, 8:43 pmHi Marie,
Yes this is taking time to figure out but I do feel a little stronger about it . I have struggled a lot still have nothing concrete except my own continuing experience and sense of things . I am working on not feeling so bloody hopeless constantly-or lonely. Something has got to give.It is a long journey no doubt about it. I just hope I have enough time to really experience a time with out the constant monkey in my brain. no I am afraid I do not feel like some unrivalled secret genius etc. Just the opposite .One help I have to pass on is that I finally approached a chiropractor on this. He is Canadian has known me for a long time ( I consider him my primary health care person at this stage) . His response was that it was a possibility. Examning my neck he found problems. I have had some adjustments and yes it has helped me to think more clearly and definatly lifted my mood. Of course like anything else you has to find the right chiropractor .
You may have got my previous response to your really encouraging mail. Thanks again, just thought I would mention something that has helped me. Janine x
Posted by Janine | February 10, 2012, 12:40 pmI have just come onto this site after being given the address by my doctor. After reading about adhd and now seeing your comments, my life also now makes sense. I have literally just been to the doctors, and all he did was give me the address for this site and said there is no medical cure (which i understand) and that i probably do have adhd but there is no test or any way to diagnose it. I really dont know where to go from here, and i only just managed to pluck up the courage and mention it to my doctor! After reading about adhd, i got excited at the fact that i can finally make sense of everything, and now i’ve hit a brick wall
Posted by Lynsey | September 9, 2011, 3:33 pmThank your doctor for giving you the address of this site. Tell him that on the site you have read that there are tests for ADHD (psychological, not physiological), and it can be diagnosed. There is not a cure for it, but there are treatments and details are in the NICE guidelines, which he should probably read. All of this information is available in greater detail in various parts of the site. He should then refer you to someone who can diagnose ADHD (a psychiatrist).
Posted by AADD-UK | September 11, 2011, 12:08 ami know exactly how you feel. My doctor didnt care either, but i went back today and saw a different doctor and explained myself a little better than last time and she said that the mental health something-or-other (ive forgotten already!) will contact me in four weeks. I think you have to be persistant. this time i said that it really affects my life negatively, its not just my own peace of mind that i want, its some kind of help whether it be couselling or medicine. i said i desperatley wanted a professional who is trained to see what the problem is- maybe its ADD, or maybe its something i havent even heard of. i said that is affected me forever and now i get depressed, fearful, anxious and ive got myself into such a mess with money that its actually detrimental to me. the more i went on about it, the more she softned. she started off telling me to call some helpline for depression and saying there isnt anything that can be done for ADD, but after i let it all out and i burst into tears, she then said she’ll contact the mental health thing. i now have a little bit of hope. before this, i felt exactly how you feel. do try again with a different doctor and say how much it affects you badly x good luck x
Posted by Flo | September 27, 2011, 1:23 pmI wish I didn’t think I had Adhd . I wish if I have, that I was young enough to be taken seriously. I am afraid of drugs. I am waiting for this to go away. Through the lens of adhd my entire life now makes sense. I am alone with this. I am a UK citizen abroad in a country that barely believes ADHD exists, and not in adults. So its not that somehow despite all the ideas runing through my head, the stuff I can understand. And all I want to learn, despite all this I am not either chronically stupid or intellectually deficit. Still there is no way I can find here that there is help. I have made a further fool of myself trying. I don’t want to keep on banging my head against this wall. Its getting harder now -if i am right there is no cure no fixing this no way to change that I can avail of. How can I be so stupid? Even the people I have sppken to here are either doubting, depressed, frustrated or in denial. I keep in touch with this site because it tells me that somewhere else things are different.It helps to know that I may not be the freak I have always believed myself to be. J.
Posted by Janine Mozaic | August 1, 2011, 9:48 amiv just found this site and your comment has got me in tears !! please please dont feel stupid im 34 iv just been diagnosed with adhd after years of just thinking i was a freak and it was only when my 3rd child got diagnosed with adhd that the doctors would even start the ball rolling to get me the diagnoses i need to get the help support and possibly medication i need. I still feel ashamed to tell most people that i have adhd because of the stigma that comes with it, but your not stupid were not stupid!! since getting my diagnosis i feel so excited for the first time in years that i can receive the help i need to support my children properly as i always thought i was just not a good enough mother, can i just ask which country are you in?and could you not come and get support in this country? its helped me lots to buy books on adhd to make more sence of what its about from the addiss website if there is any info you would like me to get for you from over here you could let me know and ill try my best to help!! good luck with everything and take care marie x
Posted by marie dawson | August 9, 2011, 8:56 amHI Marie,
Sorry I didn’t reply sooner i just found found your email. Thankyou for sending it . It is so amazing when someone simply believes you even when you don’t even believe yourself! I am managing, I hope you are too. And don’t doubt that you are a more concientous aware mother than many because of the obstacles you face. I have struggled through both motherhood and academic study too both winning and losing , of course, always taking unbelievabable, ridiculous detours ! At last I now know what that’s about. Still incredibly frustrating. I know this is easier said than done -Please never be angry with yourself, just get back on route when you have just realised what you have just found so incredibly interesting is not actually on this moments adgenda! -be bloody minded about getting where you want to be or even simply finding how to feel allright about yourself (because if you are in anyway like me I want to be in lots of places!), no matter what anyone else thinks -remember to laugh in the face of it all or have that cry and it will help. And forgive yourself continuously -I mean it – It can be one of our secret tools! rather than the self mutilation we can indulge in. We are not stupid and I shouldn’t shout it accross the net that I am! I care and am sorry I hurt your feelings Marie, I should be more aware. I hope you find this -We are both tougher than we know I think! Thankyou for your support. I will check in again and if you want let me know how you are doing ? I would like to know. J.
Posted by Janine | February 7, 2012, 2:39 pmi know this may come accross as harsh but i have just found this site (mainly your comment!) and feel some sence of relief that there are other people in similar situations, i am working towards a diagnosis (forcing it through the NHS) but i’m angry that i spent my childhood and my teen years as a social outcast and depressed. i seem to struggle with tasks that i see as being simple and easy, wrighting an essay takes me weeks and i’ve been called lazy and stupid by teachers and parents. i’ve been told i have asbergers and half a ton of other thing as well as bipolar disorder. i have no will left to be pulled about anymore but i can’t live the way i do, even though i am in the uk, i still feel very very alone. i hope to hell that i am not a freak and it can be treated, but it’s what my whole character is based on.
Posted by 8lois8 | August 13, 2011, 5:31 pmyour comment seems to sum me up. i too have stuggled through school, college and work placements, my parents tried to fight for the education system to give me some sort of support. but alot of the time i was branded as a naughty child. its only now since 8 years of working, i have returned back to college after being unable to work due to drepression and anxiety that the college and nhs mental health team are ‘believing’ that i do need support. i was almost ready to give up- thinking that this is just me an odd girl who cant seem to complete such easy and normal everyday tasks, its kinda scary to think i dont really know who i am if all my thoughts a behaviour can be explained through ADHD. i too have been told have all sorts of things but apparrently they all overlap. i too feel alone with it too but im clinging to some hope, keep fighting your corner with the nhs you will get there eventually. Naomi x
Posted by naomi | November 4, 2011, 3:33 pm